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Foto Friday - Shopping
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May 25, 2012 9:11 am
118 Views
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Out here in the canyon the nearest shops are a feed store, a junk yard, an agricultural supplier and a building supply across the highway from a gas station / mini mart. Other than that it’s get in the car and drive.
I am a discount store shopper. My habits were no doubt inspired by some of the happy memories I have of the few quality times spent with my mother. Twice a year we would go to NYC. My father took us out to dinners and shows but the days were spent with my mother who had a real thing for bargain hunting – whether we needed or could even use her finds. She and I would spend a couple of days prowling the bargain basements, garment district and other places where she could bargain like a tourist in Mexico. She had very expensive tastes so I learned how to find the good value items.
As a mother of a large family I had to stretch the budget so frequented discount stores. I could find the brand name items my kids wanted for a price I could afford. I lived about 2 miles from one of the largest outlet malls in the country but seldom went there. There were 3 major malls within 10 miles but I hate the crowds and confusion.
My current routine includes a weekly visit to Ross. I seldom have a planned agenda and look through the store for things I need or have on my “wish list”. They also have a 10% senior discount every Tues. The first time I was eligible I turned 55 on a Tues. Guess where I spent my lunch break? Target is right next door to Ross and I can pick up supplies for my residence facility on the same stop. Both are on the way from here to there.
My collage was taken this week and shows some of my “bargains” as well as some of the merchandise I might have purchased if I needed it.
Top row - The parking lot and entrance, star pillows that would go with my décor if I had a place for them and a huge display of hand bags. I didn’t buy any of these items today but with the ban on plastic bags spreading I am considering getting a couple of huge handbags so I will be prepared for spur of the moment purchases.
Middle row – sexy shoes for me, size 14 shoes for my son (didn’t buy these) and a bound leather covered journal book with the Serenity Prayer embossed on the cover that I bought this for less than $10.
Bottom row - specialty coffee for less than $5 per package (bought them), an erratic display of gadgets for Father's Day(didn't buy any)and 3 authentic Mexican stoneware decorations all for less than $10.00. (Bought these and a few “unmentionables”).
There is also the social aspect. I frequently run into friends and former coworkers there. This week it was a woman I hadn’t seen in about 6 years. We spent a half an hour catching. There are also the spontaneous conversations with strangers to discuss some item or other.
I know - I am child like and easy to entertain but it keeps me smiling and makes even the most mundane tasks like shopping fun.
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25
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Ditch the Game Players
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May 23, 2012 11:13 pm
183 Views
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I ran across this article last week. I know we all run across many game players, both male and female. However, I think this article is a bit harsh. It gives the impression that all men on dating sites are there to play games and / or somehow defective. Worse yet it more or less implies that older men who are single are somehow defective.
I admit I have met my share but in my experience there are plenty of genuine people on line as well.
What do you think?
Ditch the Game Players
May 13, 2012 at 12:00 am
By Liam ext. 9290
They’re Older, But That Doesn’t Mean They’re Wiser
Barbara from York, South Carolina asks:
I am an older reader on this site, and have been involved with a man who is the biggest test of my integrity ever in my life. I would like to know your take on why men in their late 50s and early 60s, most of whom have been married at least once, tend to be game players. You would think by this stage in life that they would know what respect is for someone who has an attraction for them. A lot of these men are on online dating sites, writing very detailed descriptions of what they seek in a partner, and when they find one that fits all the things they say they desire, they push the woman’s self-esteem to the breaking point, make false accustions (which by the way are descriptions of their own problems), and then tell the woman she doesn’t trust a relationship. It’s very hard to build trust when the foundation is so flawed. I would be most interested in your idea of why men this age are wasting the last best years they have on such nonsensical behavior.
Liam’s Response:
Greetings, Barbara. I’m certain your experience is shared by many and, hopefully, I can put the issue into perspective. I warn you, a lot of my explanation will not be terribly palatable. Still I sense that you are tougher than most and I believe you will be able to take my observations on the matter and apply them in a fashion that will be advantageous. Just remember, it doesn’t do any good to become wrathful or despondent over the dictates of nature. What I’m about to discuss has nothing to do with what is fair or right or just. As Sergeant Barnes in the great cinema classic Platoon so wisely observed, “There’s the way it ought to be… and there’s the way it is.”
What you’re experiencing with these gentlemen is simply a matter of value placement in sexual selection. As I’ve said before, in general, men will not choose sexual monogamy unless they are given no other option. And in the case where monogamous patterns are established by theological or cultural protocol, men will usually prefer to mate with women much younger than themselves because the younger the woman the more children she may potentially give birth to. It doesn’t matter that he has no plans to have children. Common sense has precious little to do with the matter. The testicles rule this game and the beast buried in the subconscious steers the ship. I understand that most men in the age group you’re talking about have already married, mated and had offspring… But make no mistake, the only reason they’re dating women in their own age bracket is because they feel they have no other choice. If they were men of significant means or social power or were famous artists of any kind, believe me, they wouldn’t be on dating sites nor would they be considering partners over forty. The men you’re talking to would much rather be talking to 21 year olds and if you were 21, they’d treat you a good deal better… because they’d have to. You see, men don’t generally like women as people, Barbara. There’s a whole host of social, cultural and theological reasons for that particular mess. I won’t go into it all here but suffice it to say that when these men were younger and the women they pursued were of breeding age, they had to play nice in order to get laid and maintain a reasonably peaceful home. Now those days have passed and suddenly they find young girls aren’t an option anymore. Time and their own socio-economic positions force them to accept older partners which they tend to view as lesser or lower quality choices. They resent this reminder of their mortality. They resent having to date within their own age group and thus they feel entitled to treat you like dirt.
Now you, Barbara, and all the other women out there of maturity and sophistication, deserve far better than you’re getting. Why on earth would you subject yourself to anyone who would test your ethics and standards as a human being? Why play some silly game based on rules that cater to the whims of male objectification? What you really need to do is take a good hard look at yourself and find out why it’s so important that you have a man in your life? Is it really worth your self-respect? Once upon a time, women of age were the great crones, the holy women and elders of the tribe. Revered, honored and protected, they were the ones who kept the secrets of magic and gave counsel. Stop dishonoring yourself. You hold a birth right far more potent than anything a man can give you. But if you insist on continuing to look for one… please make it a good one. Stay away from dating sites. Very seldom will you find men of wisdom and maturity who have overcome their biological limitations and learned to enjoy women as actual people as well as pretty faces and inviting bodies, hanging out on one of those. When you do meet a man that interests you, make friends with him first, and consider dating him only after he has proved himself both respectful and worthy. Modern society takes value away from older women and I doubt it’ll be giving much back any time soon. You have to learn to value yourself. With that in mind, and with your own good sense, I see that better times… and better men… are headed your way.
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22
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Bouncing off the Walls
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May 22, 2012 9:27 pm
121 Views
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For the past few days I have been bouncing off the walls with energy. I was excited and hyper over the ellipse but only considered the scientific and artistic aspects. Neither disappointed me but I am still pretty hyper. I did some research this morning and found that in the spiritual and astrological sense eclipses release tremendous energy and that this particular one with concurrent with some other energizing astrological and astronomical events. One of the articles I read described it as a computer having upgraded software installed then needing to reboot.
Extra energy sounds good right? Well, not entirely so. When I am supercharged I cannot sit still and focus long enough to get anything done, leave a trail of scattered and misplaced objects in my wake, tend to be abrupt in conversations, jump from one thing to another etc. Chuck was actually relieved Sunday night when I announced that I was going out to visit friend and would be back sometime the next day. Earlier he suggested that maybe I need to get another job ( yeah right).
Yes, this could all be medicated away easily (Being ADD I have my regular meds plus extras if I need them) but I have been working on avoiding that and harnessing this energy. When I was a single working mom and later the mother of a large family my energy served a real purpose. It was what got me through but life is no longer that demanding and my friends are mostly older and simply not able to keep up with me. I also have concerns about how my aging body will stand up – so far so good but it’s always a concern.
Now for the interesting part. I usually refrain from sharing this in a general media such as blogland but decided to put it out there for comment. This is not all in my mind. There have been actual physical manifestations and experiences to substantiate my excess energy. When living with an ex who was a serious armature radio enthusiast I would wake up every AM and see swirling patterns of colors (energy). This always happened at the same time – 4 AM. Eventually we figured out that his relay station was set in the garage up against the wall and the head board of the bed was up against the other side of this wall. I checked it out and my “Swirling energy” appeared at the exact time his relay station fired up automatically each AM. Apparently my perception is sensitive enough to actually see some frequencies beyond normal human range.
I seldom get angry. I can only remember one incident in the past 10 years. I was angry beyond description with my daughter for neglecting her child. The electricity in the area of the house where my room was became very erratic with things going on and off etc. I thought there was a major electrical problem developing but I left for a planned week-end trip. When I arrived at my destination I called home to see if the house had burnt down yet. My son in law told me that right after I left things settled down and no further problem. Once while living out here I got really excited ( in a positive way). Chuck actually saw me “turn the light on” from across the room. I didn’t intend to do anything with the light but it responded to my energy none the less. He remains a Jew become agnostic but even his engineer brain acknowledges there is something there.
According to my research I have several more days of solar and astronomical events and occurrences before the external energy flow subsides. I feel sorry for anyone who has to be around me. For today am going to swim many extra laps then and hope it wears me out.
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6
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Another Eclipse Photo.
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May 21, 2012 2:11 pm
199 Views
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When I walked out to view the eclipse display on my wall my friend exclaimed "you have eclipses all over you". I admit this one is posed but it is definitely material for my website. It really projects my spiritual self in the way I want. One with the Universe.
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15
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Eclipse
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May 20, 2012 7:41 pm
225 Views
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Just finished watching the eclipse.
My neighbor and I were busy all afternoon improvising ways to watch it. Mother nature beat us to it. When She came over she just said "look". A tree plus my sun catchers projected about 50 eclipse images on the wall!
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20
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I've been Politicized
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May 20, 2012 10:46 am
286 Views
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I am known for being apolitical (simply can not tolerate the deception involved in the process any longer. During a recent discussion I remembered my youth when I was very interested in politics. I found my candidate.
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20
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Arrogance
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May 19, 2012 10:43 am
398 Views
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I referenced this before in other blogs. I always respond to winks and e-mails. If they are legitimate I do not want to miss the opportunity to make a new friend. If they are scams (which most are) I string them along for a while. I figure the time I spend messing back with them is less time they have to spend preying on more vulnerable women. Besides, it is a harmless fun for Bad Kid and all of the stuff he can come up with.
One thing I notice more of recently (that we haven’t discussed to death) is the ones who advertize their “abilities” and assets from the get go and talk about how they can please us. Come on guys, if that is all we want the adult store down town sells stuff that can do a much better job with no muss and fuss. (Thank you Women’s Lib) Maybe these men assume women think as they do? I wonder if anyone actually falls for this? Do they actually think looks even matter to us “mature” ladies? (as long as they keep their hygiene up).
The other one that amuses me is the ones that try to subtly befriend you then come up with an “emergency” and want to borrow money. Looking for love (or money in this case) in the wrong places. Most here could do with some extra ourselves and those who don’t certainly know better than just “loan” it to some we do not know well. I was playing with one of these the last few weeks. He is now on his business trip around the world and does not have regular computer access. Humm – see that he shows up on line when I log in. I am waiting the hear where and when he will have an “emergency” and thinking up some really good wild goose chases I can send him on.
Then there is “What’s love got to do with it” (the ones advertizing undying sole mate love from looking at our profile) We’ve discussed this one to death but I am still amused at the arrogance here too.
So much for Bad Kid’s amusement. The grown up me is very thankful for all of the great people I meet here and for having the wisdom to know the difference.
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29
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Photo Friday - Frames
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May 18, 2012 10:48 am
300 Views
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I took a few shots of some of my flowers framed by lemons hanging off the tree but decided that mother nature did a much better job creating than I did. These are older photos but some of my favorites.
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27
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I Hate Shoes
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May 17, 2012 9:39 am
398 Views
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I know, most women love shoes. I have more than my share and am always looking at more but truth be told I have spent more of my life barefoot.
As a child I could run across the gravel driveway and harsh straw in the fields. When I reached my teen years I lived in a cold climate so shoes were needed most of the year but come summer they were off. My mother had a fit. I was supposed to be a "lady" after all and ladies definitely do not run around barefooted like a peasant - but peasant I am. Out here in the canyon I can be barefoot most of the year. Flip flop sandals in the warm and clogs in the cooler weather are just fine. I love boots when it is really cold but they come off as soon as I am inside. Then it's stocking feet.
My mother always said I would get "fallen arches" if I didn't wear shoes. That never happened but I did get bunions and hammer toes from the years of working in high heels.
I was reminded rather painfully the other day why shoes are needed. As I posted on FB "Note to self - do not move heavy exercise equipment barefooted". No major injuries but a very painful reminder that shoes do have a function. Looks like I need to keep my hiking boots or GI Jane service boots out in plain sight as a reminder. Don't know if it will work though as I tend to not want to be bothered to take the time to "suit up" for a short term task.
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37
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Let There be Light
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May 16, 2012 10:06 am
290 Views
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Finally - the perfect lighting for my Celestial Design bedroom. I finished all of the rest months ago but had a real time finding the right lighting. First issue was the color scheme. Celestial designs are usually in blue / gold but my creations had to be brown, orange and yellows to accommodation masculine preferences (remember I was designing a home for a man).
Nothing available in the traditional stores would meet my criteria. Finding nothing on line I searched for materials to make my own punched metal lamps but came up empty there too. finally I found a place that had what I wanted. They order each item from Mexico where it is handcrafted. Of course this was only the lamp shades but the other parts were readily available at any home improvement store. With a combination of special orders from Mexico and the local home dumpo my room is now complete.
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15
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